Shuba’s Weblog

Journeys of the soul…

Happy endings..

on October 19, 2007

I saw this lovely movie called ‘Once’ on wednesday nite with a dear friend. It is this wonderful movie about these two people who connect to each other (through music) and who really and truly enrich each other. The movie was beautiful. The people in it were great and the music was simply wonderful. As I was enjoying the movie, this thought came to me: that I wanted the movie to end happily. for the hero and heroine to be with each other. In a flash, I realized I always wanted happy endings. to every day, to every thing I did, and in the big scheme of things, I wanted things to be happy. I have always been that way. If you look at my blogs, you will realize that every one of them ends positively. Its a happy ending to the story. and in movies and books, I seldom count books with sad endings or suffering, as my favorites.

I’m a positive person and thats a good thing I hope. But I can’t help but wonder, what if happy endings did not always happen..? I was in this dharma discussion group once, where we talk about obstacles in our path to happiness in a very supportive and non-judgemental group. In this group, one of the women had just lost her partner of 35 years, and she was in deep grief. She could not reconcile with the absence of her loved one. In the face of grief, she could not understand theoritical terms like mindfulness and impermanance. She missed her love deeply…and as I was listening to the story, tears were streaming down my face. I was thinking-what would I do in a situation like this-I can’t even imagine. Just thinking of the idea of losing the person I love the most, some day, scared me. I wouldn’t want to live anymore, I think. As I listened to this woman, all these thoughts crossed my mind-how do I console her when I don’t know what I would do?

Even as I realized in the movie, how scared I was at not having my happy ending, I knew that I could not predict the future. I could only live one day at a time. and hope I find the strength to face whatever comes up. and then, after the movie, my lovely friend Sarah told me the answer beautifully-when we don’t find that happy ending-we change our definition of happiness. I think that would be the key.

Life holds happy and sad endings, and its the sad that makes the happy worthwhile. I know that deep inside, I know you do too. Now, we shall just have to remind ourselves of it and find the happiness in sorrow. The kind of happiness that is rooted in equanimity. That is beyond the boxes we label ‘happy’ and ‘sad’, ‘good’ and ‘bad’. We know things will come up and that is fine. Indeed that is what the fabric of life is made of. And we will find the answers when we need to. when the time comes.

I won’t tell you how the movie ended-except that it was very moving.

I hope we all find the strength to see the truth in whatever comes up. and find happiness in it.

Love, S.

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