Shuba’s Weblog

Journeys of the soul…

Mystic river…

on May 19, 2008

This morning, I saw a glimpse of the magnificently beautiful mountains. they seemed so close, within reach and yet so far away. The blue sky peeping underneath the dark clouds, offering the hint of glorious sunlight in the rain. There are these moments when we catch a glimpse of beauty, of bliss. We see through a tiny window into the amazing. Most of our lives, we carry this longing, this glimpse of promised land in our hearts.

Growing up, one of the things I loved doing when I was alone, was to sing with a mike in unison with my favorite songs. It made me feel amazing and alive. Like I was a diva. And yet, I could never do it in front of others. My voice would freeze. I knew then that the world was not ready to see my true spirit, the full expression of me.

We go through our lives, knowing that there is much more to us and much more to life. only we are not able to reach it – this place of wonder, beauty and bliss. It sometimes catches us in unguarded moments. when we feel love. love of any kind. Seeing a beautiful dog pointing its nose in the air out of the window of a car. The amazing miracle of spring. Of being held warmly by a loved one when we are cold. when a beautiful song touches our spirit.

These moments often don’t last very long-simply because our mind starts clinging to what was a beautiful desire and feeling. and that happiness is no longer spontaneous. So, we revert back to longing. Of more of this bliss. that seems so close and yet so elusive.

Longing is a profound word. Through centuries, poets and devotees have spoken about longing. This longing for love, for God. To feel this overwhelming flood of grace. This longing itself is a beautiful emotion and one can get trapped in it. For there is something so sublime and heartfelt about this longing. And yet, what we are longing for, is actually not that far. It is only a moment away. This sounds like a cliche. But it is true. Have you ever caught yourself longing for something even as you actually have it? I remember once being in a massage and longing for one. The longing was not for the massage but this imaginary feeling the mind remembered from other times.

Mindfulness lets us go past this longing to this actual place of bliss. To reside in this bliss, we have to be able to recognize longing for what it is. revel in its mystery and beauty. and then let it go. and when we become fully aware of the spectrum of emotions we feel, we come fully into contact with the divine, with bliss. We enter this moment. For we are always with the divine. We just aren’t aware of it. Even in our most pain-filled moments, we can be in touch with the divine. Being in communion with the divine universal spirit is not conditional. It is not affected by our actions or emotions. True, some of our actions make us more aware of this divine energy than others. And as we start deepening our awareness, we are able to make a choice. For our actions to reflect our divine errand.

Its the slow unfolding of our soul for what it is. has always been. divine.

Here is to witnessing the divine mysteries of our soul,

with love, S.

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