Reading and practicing from ‘Dancing with life’ with my sangha, is continuing to be a wonderful experience, a journey unfolding. This week, we are reading the chapter about desires and attachments. Philip Moffitt says beautifully in the book about how desires are not a bad thing. in fact, they may be necessary to live compassionately and lovingly. it is when they become clouded with attachment that they become suffering. and to mindfully inquire into the stickiness of clinging. and how it feels in the body.
the neat thing about mindfulness is that one always has ample opportunities for practice 🙂 always the good old friend suffering waiting around the corner.
I started this week in a new office space. one that is bigger and more spacious with more windows. a wonderful thing. and as you can expect, I was very excited. and I could witness how along with the excitement, was this huge baggage. that somehow, now I had to prove that I was ‘worth’ the office. fear of satisfying imaginary expectations. of how others will now perceive me. of decorating it just right. my body contracting as I realized that even a good thing only lead to suffering.
not quite. it wasn’t the new office that created the suffering. the office was just what it was. another space between four walls. it was my clinging, my identification with it that lead to feeling bad.the turning point was when I realized that if the office was taken away from me tomorrow, I would be miserable!
and somehow, just noticing that I was doing it, and that I had a choice to let go made me feel much lighter. and come back to the present moment. and simply appreciate the event for what it was. good fortune and good timing. and nothing lasts forever. and things always change.
change is the essence of life. sometimes we have something to do with it, other times, change just happens. and we have to go along. dance with it.
I had a taste of liberation. and then I went back – to the same computer codes and presentations. just a little bit wiser and little bit more mindful.
with love, S.