Shuba’s Weblog

Journeys of the soul…

opening…

on October 17, 2009

Have you known pure joy ? the joy that arises in you and is not due to anything in particular. you just know that what you are feeling is a joy that has a touch of magic to it. that it is not dependent on things being a certain way. it just is. you know it will pass. and yet, it is here right now. that even your habitual tendencies of making yourself feel bad, judging, evaluating, all of these cower in the face of this pure joy. it just is. and it comes from a deep place of contentment that comes from stillness.

that is the joy of the practice of mindfulness and love, metta, that I have known. in my practice, on my retreat. the practice of choiceless awareness, of vipassana. I think I ‘get’ it, what the practice is about. it is the knowing that you don’t have any control over what comes up in life. can you find a way that allows you to be with whatever comes up ? and this way, that our lovely teacher Michele Mcdonald taught us, the way that resonated with my being, was through love. of knowing that things are the way they are because of love. everything is. and cannot exist without this love and this love allows us to be mindful and look underneath without judging. a new way of being. of receiving grace. Michele’s being radiates with this. and practicing this gave me a sense of deep peace and joy that seemed unshakeable.

how can I not attach to this! ? this glimpse of peace, the heart longs for more. ofcourse the heart longs for more. that is the human nature, wanting of more of that which is pleasant and a turning away from the unpleasant. and this too, we learn. coming back from retreat, the full force of my attachment hit me. and I am learning slowly to be with it. that is the practice, the starting over. again. of being.

may we abide in metta with life as it is, with joy and gratitude and compassion
with love, S.

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